Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Psh, Please

I open my email and am greeted by the following email. Look, Mr. and Ms. Would-Be-Scammers. If you're gonna try to con me outta my hard earned moolah, do me a favor. Learn to spell. It'll make you that much more credible which means I just might be dumb enough to fall for it.


From ::
dateWed, Apr 15, 2009 at 1:17 PM
subjectU.S. Bancorp Customer Account Information !

U.S. Bank Internet Banking is constantly working to increase security for all our Internet Banking users. To ensure the integrity of our online payment system, we periodically review accounts.

Your account might be placed on restricted status. Restricted accounts continue to receive payments, but they are limited in their ability to send or withdraw funds.

* Bonnie Says :: Wow, I'd actually be worried...but hey! I don't have an account with you so I'm aaaaall good. But thanks for being so concerned, Mr. / Ms. Scam Artist. I feel warm and fuzzy now because I know you have my best interest at heart. *

To lift up this restriction, you need to login into your account, then you have to complete our verification process. You must confirm your account details and your billing information as well. All restricted accounts have their billing information unconfirmed, meaning that you may no longer send money from your account until you have updated your billing information on file.

To initiate the billing update confirmation process, please visit U.S. Bank Internet Banking trough our web formular attached to this email.

* Bonnie Says :: Huh??!! What?? The hell is a "trough" in relations to banking? Isn't that what horses and other barnyard animals get their water and feed from? I didn't know you could do banking from them too. And what the hell is a "formular"? Is that like a formula? Dude, I reason why I rely on internet banking to balance my checkbook for me is because I don't WANT to deal with things like math and "formulars". Mmkaythxbye. *

U.S. Bank Investments apologise for any inconvenience this may cause.
Thank you,
[this part was left blank. How shady!!!]

Bonnie Says :: I'd also like to APOLOGIZE for any inconvenience your horrible spelling may cause.

U.S. Bank - Other banks promise great service, U.S. Bank guarantees it.
Please do not reply to this email. This mailbox is not monitored and you will not receive a response. For assistence, log in to your U.S. Bank Internet Banking account and click the Help link located in the top right corner of any U.S. Bank Internet Banking page. This email (including any attachments) is intended for the above-mentioned person(s). If you are not the intended recipient of this email, please delete this email immediately. It is private and confidential and may contain legally privileged information.

Bonnie Says :: Oh brother....please Please PLEASE STEP UP YOUR GAME AND LEARN TO SPELL!!! If Hooked Oh Phonics really works. I highly recommend it for you people.


This concludes Bonnie's Public Service Announcement for the day.

No comments:

Post a Comment